10 Ways to Keep Perspective in This Blog Eat Blog World
I’m just going to be real honest today. There are many days, I want to stop blogging. I wonder why I continue to throw myself out there day after day – and put my already insecure self through the daily routine of rejection vs affirmation.
If you are a writer, blogger, author, speaker or any human that shares from their heart to influence others – the following might encourage you.
This post is really for me. I have to stop and remind myself almost daily about perspective. Or, the lack of comments, comparison, mind swirling… will eat me alive.
10 Ways to Keep Perspective in This Blog Eat Blog World
1. Mission Clarity
I have found it extremely helpful to have a mission statement and continue to ask God to confirm this blog. And, have truly open hands – like ready and willing to stop at anytime. Thankfully, my purpose for this blog is not for income for our family. Although, doors have opened through it for sure. So, I could literally delete tomorrow and be great. I believe it is critical to be clear and why are you doing it and the purpose for YOU personally or the comparisons will eat you alive.
2. Focus on Getting Better, Not Bigger:
This one comes straight from the leadership at Chick-fil-A. Critical lesson. That company has always focused on getting better before bigger. Do you know they could open SO MANY MORE restaurants every year? But they don’t. They focus on improving and slowly growing. My boss used to say, “If we focus on getting better, the customer will demand we get bigger.” I think about this often. I don’t need to worry about bigger ever. I need to go back to mission and do my best at what God has called me to do. And, I REALLY trust – opportunities will come. And, they have so many times.
3. Set Your Boundaries
Do you know when I start feeling crummy about myself? When I’m online too long. Wasting time. This might be different for you. I think for each of you – we have to listen to those cues and set boundaries. Delete my blog if you need to! Is there one or some that defeat you? Is it all blogs? Is it Facebook? Pinterest? This isn’t from God. He’s there to comfort and lead you to walk confidently in the center of His will. He’s not in the game of taking you down into a world of self doubt every day. So, start putting up boundaries or deleting. It’s freedom. And, hard.
4. What’s the Measure of a Man?
Well, I’m pretty sure the measure of a man will never be in likes or comments. I pray that I will never ever see on someone’s tombstone – she had x,000 followers on social media. Seriously? Who cares. I pray the measure of the man or woman is how well we loved and if we shared the gospel of Jesus. And, did we care for our own priorities first before telling others what to do with their lives?
5. When It Really Hurts
Good grief I know it hurts. I know when your very best friends or husband or family don’t ever read or comment. Let me push you and me a bit. Are you busy? and crazy? Do you have time for the 100 blogs of your friends? You aren’t reading those or every commenting – so why do we expect our friends to make time for our blogs? It’s a little silly – that in the silence, we assume the worst. The silence doesn’t mean they think we are dumb. It means they are living their lives and trying to get food on the table and not lose their brains. Unfortunately, not being on someone’s radar isn’t mean – it’s just reality. And that is OK! I have to toughen up and believe what I pray for – Lord, just let one post impact one person each time. Whoever your want it to reach.
Lysa TerKeurst put this up yesterday. Loved it!
6. Does Your Heart Match the Output?
This is a tough one. If you scroll through your Twitter feed and Facebook feed, it’s a good indication of what you’re trying to accomplish. My heart is that you will follow Jesus and not follow Me through my blog. My heart is that you will learn practical and fun ways to bring faith to live in your home. My heart is to love and encourage moms. If I look through what I had going “out” – does that match up? Similar to our bank accounts and calendars – they really show what we love right now. So, scroll through and see if your heart and mission is lining up with the output. If not, blog eat blog world might have sucked you into some practices that you didn’t intend to do from the start.
7. Don’t Let It Rule You
Did I mention all of these are tips for me? Many folks make a living from blogging (I do not – just haven’t ever accepted ads – too frazzled, not against it). That is awesome. I have a product and certainly do marketing and push folks to buy it. Is that wrong? I do not think so. The danger is when the entire thing consumes your life. The hard part is that we often do this from home so it all blends together. I think sometimes our friends and our husbands want us to PUT THE COMPUTER AND THE PHONE DOWN CRAZY LADY. Or, they are afraid to come in our presence with dirty hair because they might get instragrammed. Or, if they say something, it’s going to get put on twitter in seconds. I’ve got to learn to have some boundaries and not let this world consume me.
8. Be a Great Steward
So, if you have more than 1 follower or reader – I believe we have to be a great steward of those people. God has very clear instructions on those that teach. And just because we have a blog, doesn’t make us any smarter or wiser than those reading. I am so sad to think about the number of blog posts I just wrote through emotion and just “published” without praying through and REALLY thinking about each word or how it might impact others. I have just realized there are young people reading my blog. Oh, how my heart yearns to put a positive spin on motherhood. It’s so amazing. I want my girls to YEARN for the days of motherhood not dread it.
“Not many of you should become teachers, my brothers, for you know that we who teach will be judged with greater strictness.” James 3:-1
9. Do You Worship the Work
My friend had the courage to send this me one day. It stung a bit – because it rang so true. It’s a daily struggle. Those in ministry or doing anything from God can easily get off track. Read this. Whoah.
10. Be encouraged.
I will tell you this. I haven’t quit. Do you know why? God is in this. And it sounds silly but He’s confirmed it enough times. It isn’t the blog posts that go crazy or shared bunches of times that keep me going. It’s the emails from the moms. It’s the hugs and tears from women that read something and took action. They had the courage to do something different in their life. It’s conversations about God I am having with friends I have prayed for – MY WHOLE LIFE. I’d do it all again or a handful of these moments. I believe God can work through all of us – blog or no blog. Be encouraged, if you have no comments (maybe turn them off if it’s bugging you) or no “likes” – if He has called you to write it, He will use it.
Love it Courtney! So true. Why I quit blogging the first time around. Got way too caught up in all that. I have to severely limit Facebook too. It’s not good for me to read a list of everyone’s activities and only pics of best days all the time. It makes me feel like I’m failing sometimes. Hang tough Courtney! Your blog is such an encouragement to me!
Paige
I needed this so badly. Every bit of it. I constantly run the risk of letting the competition of being a blogger overwhelm me. I got a nice little wake up the other day when I had a deadline to meet and got an email that my post was missing HTML and had to go in an change it… totally blowing off my quiet time before work. My husband instantly walked by and saw that I wasn’t doing my usually studying and mentioned that I should put things in perspective. I love blogging, and the minor amount of money that comes with it has made for some fun guilt free purchases for us. But I can’t let it get between God and I ever.
Awesome post! I blog for my own enjoyment and if someone else enjoys it, then that’s just “icing on the cake.” Have a great week and keep up the great posts!
I love your blog! Thanks for teaching and encouraging us moms.
my friend. you would not believe the craziness about THIS very thing that just consumed my day yesterday. out of the blue. didn’t even see it coming. long story short, this was so needed today. i can’t even tell you…
love you. amen & amen & amen.
Hi Courtney! As an old person reading your blog faithfully, I seldom (I think once) comment. Please know that you are doing a good work! Your honesty,humor and authenticity are very refreshing even if I am silent most of the time
Great post my friend. Love the ‘Do you worship the work’ devo. You are doing a great job being a faithful steward with the gifts God’s given you.
Courtney, this blog post is filled with some of the best wisdom I have read on boundaries in social media. I LOVE your heart, your passion and your giftedness to share hard truth with great love.
So thankful Bobbie connected us!
Blessings,
Wendy
I am encouraged Courtney! I think I have almost stopped blogging about 5 times this week. But there is just something about Jesus. He is Lord and I cannot stop writing about all that He is. So even if it my MIL is the only one who reads- may He be glorified. I also want to let you know that my son LOVES his lil light of mine cards and is memorizing away!
SUCH fantastic wisdom. Wisdom this blogger needed to read, for sure. When I started blogging, I had no idea how many pitfalls it would come with, no idea how I would end up trying to tie my worth to a small bit of space on the computer. Thanks for being honest about getting the whole blogging struggle AND especially for the great perspective keeping tips. So glad Wendy Blight linked to you. 🙂
Loved this post!! One I need to remember and return to! Along with Lysa’s comment I had someone tell me – “Remember to have thick skin and a tender heart.” Just this past week our pastor spoke about comparison – it’s a crazy thing we do, that really gets us in trouble! Thank you for sharing, shedding some light and giving us some wisdom. Blessings!
Love this. Last year I got too caught in the “comparison trap” and decided to cut back some on my blogging. It’s been good for me and for my family. Thank you for sharing your heart with us today on this subject!
Um, how did you crawl into my head and know how I too often feel and how very much I needed this? Court, thank you for allowing God to speak through you with the wisdom and encouragement my heart immensely needed today. You’re amazing. Rock on! Love you friend.
Thank you for your faithfulness to write what God places on your heart. I can tell each word is intentional, each word is God-breathed, and each word is used for His glory.
From the one that needed this the very most today, thank you. I appreciate you. Blessings, my friend!
jennifer. thank you for your precious words. so thankful we’ve “met” through this blog world. always here for you.
Oh my! THIS is getting bookmarked for future reference. Thank you for your words!
Whoop! Thanks, Courtney… Read. My. Mind. I struggle too, with the pull toward family (always) and the mission God has set me on. And the desire to stop striving and start resting in His plan. Thank you for these wonderful reminders. Blessings!
Wow!! That.was.awesome. I may print this off. Well said!!
Thank you for sharing. I don’t always comment but I always appreciate your thoughtful and well written posts!
Courtney, thank you, so very much! I’ve needed this today. Been putting off the blogging and wondering about throwing in the towel, but I know my purpose and reason for being on this planet is to encourage others, healthfully…
I shall write, TODAY. Thank you!
yay tess. so glad!
12 runs in 1 ball…must watch
http://riurl.com/OewgVu
thank you. Thank you. I need to print and savor.
Tell her what she and your relationship mean to you and what you
hope for in your hopeful shared future.