“I just feel mean so much of the time,” my friend whispered through the leak of tears. Downward, the salty droplets slipped and so did her heart, her resolve, and her assurance of being a good mom.
“I understand,” I whispered back.
And sometimes that’s all that needs to be said.
I don’t remind her of gentleness verses. I don’t try to fix anything. I don’t offer solutions or articles or statistical data.
I simply under-stand.
Under… to dip low and find that same place that lies beneath my outside veneer.
We all have an under.
And I admit, “I’ve felt mean so many times too. I’ve set out to have a super day with my kids only to be red faced and aggravated minutes later. Buckling under the weight of my imperfections, I’ve wondered if I’ll ever get it right. It sometimes feels like all the other moms are doing it better. But that’s not true. All moms struggle.”
Stand… to come alongside in a position of strength, closeness, and unwavering support.
We all need those friends who we know will stand right with us.
And I reassure, “Somehow, God shows us how and fills in the gaps if we ask Him. The fact you’re crying shows a heart tender enough for God’s molding and shaping to occur. Don’t listen to the world’s answers. And don’t fall into the trap of trying to be like other moms. Just saturate yourself in God’s truth and trust the gut instincts He gives you.”
“…Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word,” Ephesians 5: 25-26.
I love that picture of Christ washing us through the Word.
Some versions of this verse call this washing- sanctifying.
But since fancy words sometimes make my brain feel tangled and lost in words too proper, I need something simple.
The Greek meaning of this sanctifying is Hagiazo.
And when I unwrap the package of this word, “Hagiazo,” I find the three treasures. It means:
1. to cleanse externally.
2. to free from the guilt of sin.
3. to purify internally by the renewing of the soul.
Externally, I can dry my tears. God’s mercies make all things new. Past minutes are gone. But this minute brings with it a fresh start.
Relationally, I can be freed from the guilt. God’s forgiveness reminds me to say I’m sorry and live in the freedom of repentance.
Internally, I see my depravity but refuse to wallow in it. It’s a call to action. Another place to receive the Truth and learn to live it out.
Yes, I understand sweet friend.
My need to be sanctified is great. Just like your need is.
We’re all in that place.
We all sometimes feel mean.
Unable.
Incapable.
Insecure.
Broken down.
So, let the Words of Christ wash afresh over you, in you, and all about you. And let the whispers of a friend assure you, I under-stand.
Lysa TerKeurst is a New York Times bestselling author and speaker who helps everyday women live an adventure of faith through following Jesus Christ. As president of Proverbs 31 Ministries, Lysa has led thousands to make their walk with God an invigorating journey. Lysa’s personal adventure of following God captured national media attention when she and her husband adopted two teenage boys from a war-torn orphanage in Liberia, Africa. They never imagined their decision would start a chain reaction within their community, which inspired other families to adopt over 45 children from the same orphanage! Lysa’s amazing story led to appearances on The Oprah Winfrey Show, Good Morning America, The 700 Club, USA Today newspaper, Woman’s Day magazine, and Focus on the Family radio.
I had the pleasure of sitting down with Lysa this February when she was in town with her Chick-fil-A Operator husband for their annual meeting. She was as REAL and uplifting as her blog entries. And, a friendship was born. I am so thankful for how she is mentoring me and offering such wisdom as I begin this journey and try to follow His will. Lysa shared this post previously on her personal blog in March. So happy to share it with you today. Thank you Lysa! www.lysaterkeurst.com
Listening by Sandra Stanley