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Courtney DeFeo

Creator & Ideator. Motivator for Families. Cheerleader for Loving & Serving

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The Secret to Happiness

September 22, 2015 //  by Courtney

Happy-Girl

Get ready – I have found the secret to happiness. Andy Stanley confirmed it.

God has been stirring this in me for some time and I have been beating this drum for some time and I even wrote a book about. Then, my mentor passes away.

And, I sit here and process her life. What she spent time doing and how it impacted generations of family.

Naturally – I analyze my own life and what I want my life to be. A friend texted me and said, “you know she’s passing the baton to each of you. You’re carrying faith and her legacy on.”

What a challenge. I want to live just like her.

Yet she was just a woman. She was flawed and sinful like me. But so happy. So content. I sit here in awe of what one woman spent her life doing the lives and families impacted for generations because of her service. 

The secret? She was focused on others.

She served. She certainly spent time taking care of herself – she was healthy (exercised and ate well) and she humbly worked on her projects – but the CORE of Regina was giving her life away. To her husband. To her kids. To her friends. She gave and gave and gave. Not in a doormat way.

She gave it away in such a way – that people met God. In a way that people craved Jesus. In a way that marriages were mended.

One of her mentees said, “She believed in me, more than I believed in myself.”

I just listened to the final part in Andy’s HAPPY series and I HIGHLY recommend it. It is AWESOME. Put it on as you do the dishes or file away things in your office. So worth your time.

WMYH_Album

I am my happiest when I am loving on other people – it’s why I want often hang up this online stuff every other week – because it’s the local stuff I love the most. It’s the real life face-to-face ministry around me that I love the most. I am honored to have done this blog world – book stuff. But I love bringing a meal. Sitting at the hospital. Showing up at the funeral. I love the real deal local life of serving with my friends. And I don’t want the online ministry world to EVER take place of me in the lives of my local friends.

My kids are the happiest when they get off of themselves and they do something for another person. I just told Larson she had a date with me to get Ella’s bday gifts. She lit up. We just found out there is a World Relief Center in Ft. Worth – they have a list of needs. I can’t wait to show my girls the list and invite them into the process of serving refugees right here in Texas. (Other ways to serve with your kids right here.)

Guys – I want to lose 20-30 pounds – it keeps creeping up. It’s making me cranky. I found out I haven’t sold many books at all (I have high expectations of myself) and I cried. But if I’m honest, I actually don’t care. I want to be healthy and I want my books to reach the families God designed. But these trivial things cannot consume my happinenss. At my funeral – like Regina’s this Thursday – I want men and women there who knew my heart. That saw a piece of God’s heart because I loved them face-to-face. I want them to know they mattered more than my errands.

“Selfishness is natural, but it’s not by design.” – Andy Stanley

This life is short. Do what matters with the time you have. Invest in people, not things. If you find yourself so empty and unhappy – start giving of yourself. I’m remind myself too. Find a way to serve and volunteer and just give of yourself and you’ll find the secret. It’s contagious. And DOUBLE happy – I would define it as JOY… when you match up serving with your gifts – it’s just the sweet spot.

It’s the way God designed it. Your story is how He meant it to happen. To use you to love on His people using your gifts – as you are! You don’t have to move, lose weight or be someone you’re not.

Thank you Andy for reminding me the secret of life.

The value of a life is always measured by how much of it was given away.”

Regina gave her life away and she was so content. She had all of her mentees memorize this verse.

I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength. Philippians 4:11-13

“You were created to give your life away.” – Andy Stanley

“HAPPY is the man/woman who decides to give their life away.” – Andy Stanley

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About Courtney

Courtney DeFeo is most known for being a factory of ideas for families. It’s her desire to lead a life that radiates God’s love in action and His grace along the way. As a former marketing professional for corporations such as Chick-fil-A and Ketchum Public Relations, Courtney has a history of creating memorable programs and ideas that motivate others to action. She is the author of In This House, We Will Giggle, creator of ABC Scripture Cards and Virtue Cards and the kindness movement Light ‘Em Up Acts. Her latest project is a community for tween girls and their moms - found at TreasuredGirlz.com. Her house is a wreck and she hates to cook. She adores her hot, patient husband. She posts entirely too many photos of her two girls on Instagram. Connect with Courtney anytime: Twitter • Website • Facebook • Instagram

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