To New Parents, You’re Going to Love This
If I had time, I really would start an “intern blog.” Outside of my passion for moms and little ones – I LOVE INTERNS! I really do.
At both of my jobs, I was in charge of the interns and I loved this group of people. I loved their passion, their zest for life and their desire to learn and grow.
Guess what… you know you’re an old fart when your sweet baby interns are having BABIES.
I have sat at their weddings and cried like a proud mama or big sister. I have talked them through job decisions, tough relationships and more.
One of my DEAREST former interns had his first baby this week. As we texted, I was struck with how FULL my heart felt for him and his wife. I was also convicted.
Have I told them enough of the good? Am I so busy being authentic that I forgot to tell them how breathtakingly AMAZING parenting can be??
Amy, Meg, Michael, Kirsten, Lauren, Deisha, Leslie and on and on! I love you guys. This is for you. And frankly any new parent or parent to be.
New Parents, You’re Going to Love This
You know what happened to my generation? We got really bold and really courageous with our words. That is good in many ways. We spoke up under the umbrella of authenticity and told just about everything except potty breaks to the world wide web. We tweet, we blog, we instagram (ME GUILTY) every little frustration of the journey of parenthood.
I love how this builds community among parents all around the world. I love how it resolves issues and breeds discussion. However, I do think there is something about holding back like generations before. With grace and mercy, my mom endured some tough parenting moments. She didn’t tell everyone everything.
I want to be sure I do my part to tell you the good. There are some of you that are plain SCARED to death about the journey ahead. Partly based on your past and partly based on what you’re seeing from friends. You’re also reading some pretty scary stuff. Do I want my marriage to go in the tank? Do I want to look so tired and mad? Do I want to have an anger problem? Will I ever sleep again? Am I going to screw this up?
I have some great new this morning. You are in for the ride of your life. It isn’t perfect, but goodness gracious with syrup on TOP – IT IS AMAZING!!!
1. Love of your father – Parenting is worth it alone – to fully grasp the way your are loved by your Heavenly Father. When you love this child and hold this child – something changes in you. You see life differently. You see how love is truly unconditional and you SEE, you really SEE how the love of a child is possible. And, it almost takes your breath away that the ONE who created you – loves you like this. Uh – times 1 million.
2. Marriage – I have never been so in love with Ron then those moments in the hospital. Take it in. You just created a human being together. There are no other times like that in your life. You will hold a tiny bundle. This is what life is made of – these moments. Don’t let them pass. Pray together. Cry together. Let the stress roll off, give each other the benefit of the doubt. You did this together. It’s a beautiful thing.
3. You were made for this – In the early days, the EMOTIONS are no joke. It’s just a part of the process (like labor) my sweet mamas. It will be like a freight train led by the enemy. It will tell you “you are no good” and “you don’t have a clue what you are doing”. Do not listen. You do and you will. You were made for this. Truly. Made for this child. Made to be a mother. You are going to get through it. God chose YOU for this child.
4. Entrusted with a Heart – It’s almost freezes me sometimes when I think of the opportunity I have to disciple my girls. God is entrusting us with these hearts. These minds in these children. They are like SPONGES. One of this first things my sweet Lage said in his text, “I can’t wait to tell her about Jesus.” It isn’t all up to us – but oh my! can we do some serious damage in discipling the hearts of our kids. Get ready for the ride. With every walk and every tuck in at night – you have the incredible privilege to start telling them the greatest story ever told. They were created by the King of Kings and they have a purpose for their life.
5. Enjoy the rest – When they are tiny, feel no guilt laying on the couch and holding that baby. Sleeping with her/him. Strolling, rocking, staring, singing. Just rest and rest when they rest. There is a beautiful bonding happening and please write some things in a journal. Sadly, you will forget some things. 🙁 So take some sweet selfles just for you to remember the cuddles. The moments. I remember tears streaming down my face. It couldn’t be real – it’s real. And it makes every struggle worth it.
6. One book – I read every parenting book out there and sort of forgot about my Bible. I was crying and confused. I sadly forgot that His word promises some pretty amazing stuff. Open it first. Ask and beg for wisdom. He will meet you in this journey – even in the middle of the night. Just like the first one, you have NEW EYES! A new lens! As a parent, you will start seeing scripture so differently. Maybe have a new Bible in your nursery and being underlining verses you want to pray for that child over their lifetime. Or, another color pencil underline verses you need as a parent.
7. You are not alone – Welcome to the club! You will see it in the eyes of other moms, grandmothers. Strangers will nod and smile at you in Target. You are in the club. You are a parent. You know what we know. You feel what we’ve felt. And there is an ARMY of people that want to help you. Just ask for help. Please. Please. Email, call anyone that has been there. Someone saying, “oh yes, that is so normal” or “oh totally- try this” can be the best thing you hear all day.
8. Yes, the cutest – Yep, your child is the cutest human on the planet. You know and you believe it. Take 100K photos and you post away. You’ll never annoy me on Instagram. I love that you are delighted by your child and I’ll “like” away. Delight in them. Change the outfits, put the smelly lotion, whatever you dreamed about. If some “know it all mom” says “oh, gosh you don’t need that” – just move on and do your thing. You’ve waited patiently and this is your moment. You warm those wipes or use whatever thing you want. Your baby, your way.
9. Heart swell – just as quickly as the hard trials of sleeping and formula and breast-feeding will pass, so will the sweetest milestones. All of a sudden they smile and you think your heart might combust. And then they sit up and clap their hands. And, they clasp your hand and waddles next to you. Now, mine are kissing me and saying they love me to the moon and back. It’s so precious to be loved like this and have a chance to pour into their lives. What a joy.
10. Love – go and ahead and relax and breathe deep. Every parent wants to do this job perfectly and it’s just not possible. You trust God and you love them with everything you’ve got. You forgive and you apologize. You ask for help and you play. You giggle and you wrestle. You listen and you hug. You stay strong in the hard parts and remember – you are so very loved by God and never alone.
Congratulations new parents. There is way more to celebrate than there is to fear. This is a great thing. A beautiful thing you’re holding. I am so very happy for you and I KNOW you are going to be great parents.
Now, send this to a new parent that needs to know they are awesome.
Seasoned parents – feel free to add additional “good things” to the comments.
I love this Courtney! You are such an encourager. I have been using your carpool tips and they work. It’s so much more fun to start the day on a happy note. Thanks for helping me to be a better Mama!
YOu are too Jennifer. Thanks for always encouraging.
Thanks! I just gave birth to my second boy and I needed all these reminders! Now…back to the 2 a.m. feeding. 🙂
Oh bless you Jeannie. Get some sleep!
Great job on this post Courtney!! It’s great!! I’m sharing away!
So much love in this one post. I couldn’t comment immediately – I had to go snatch my sweet Baker out of his bed and do some serious snuggling, and breathing in his sweet scent (he even smells different at 16 months than he did at 15 – how is this so??). The joys, the heartaches, the struggles, the smiles, the milestones, they are each so sweet, but each so fleeting. I forget sometimes to cherish each one. Thank you for the encouragement – not only for me, but for me to share the exceedingly wonderful parts of being a mommy with others. So often, we preface conversations with, “This is the easy part. Just wait…” Instead of “This is the greatest gift, and it only gets sweeter!”
THanks sweet Jennifer. You are such a great mom.